Not Far from the Tree

A Guide to Using Personality To Build Your Business Online

August 1, 2008

Issue # 4

The Laugh's the Thing

My past invaded my present this week when my college friend Dave came over to our house for dinner. Dave is in town for business and contacted me to see if we could get together. I have not seen or spoken to Dave in about 12 years, so his visit was a walk down nostalgia lane.

That's a mixed bag.

Spending time with Dave reminded me of some great times. Times when my hair was on my head and not growing out of areas that are not supposed to have hair. Times when I could play a pick-up football game in the morning and an ultimate Frisbee game in the afternoon and still walk when I was done. Times when I could stay up late playing a video game and be ready to go the next day. Times when responsibility meant getting to an early morning class (at least sometimes).

Dave was a big part of those great college years. I met Dave through an embarrassing set of circumstances when I was a freshman. (I'll bet you are wondering what they were? Oh, all right, I'll tell you.)

My whole life, I wanted to be a gymnast. Unfortunately, I went to a small college that didn't have a gymnastics team. In my first week, I came across the cheerleading team in the quad. I thought, "Cheerleaders do gymnastics, I'll check this out." That mistake has led to teasing from my friends to this day. Next thing I know, they handed me a cheerleading uniform. I went from star football player in high school to male cheerleader in college (could this be any more embarrassing?). Dave was roommates with one of the other cheerleaders. Through our interactions, we became good friends.

Here are a few of my Dave memories:

  • Watching him play a Marvel video game in his apartment--all night long.

  • Playing ping pong on his kitchen table.

  • Going to his wedding. His wife Charity is also a good friend.

  • The best laugh ever. It's infectious. It's joyful. It's genuine and completely unselfconscious.

Here's the interesting thing: Only 6 months ago, Dave wouldn't have contacted me to get together. We had fallen completely out of touch. Then his wife connected with me on a social networking site, which led to contact with Dave. We didn't talk to each other directly. We were just social network "Friends." This week, that one little contact blossomed into a renewal of our friendship.

Dave sat at our dinner table and I got to hear his great laugh again. He was able to meet my kids and tell my wife and me about his kids. Even after 12 years, our past interactions (our friendship) allowed us to connect in a very real way over the family dinner table.

You have the same opportunity in your business. However you meet your clients and make a connection, you have an opportunity to turn that connection into a long-lasting relationship and friendship. As you do business together, as you provide a service, as your client gets to know you on a personal level and gets to hear your voice, a connection can be established. Those connections with clients are the foundation for all your future business.

What are you doing to maintain those friendships?

The lesson from my friendship with Dave is that one contact matters. It's never too late. One contact re-established a friendship that was four years in the making and twelve years in the dying. That one contact had a tremendous return. I got to hear my friend laugh again.

Bottom Line: The relationships you build in your business matter. They matter today but they also matter in the future. You need to create a systematic way to continue to build on your successful interactions with client/friends, a system to keep in contact. Whether that's coffee, a blog, or an eNewsletter, you need to do something. Even if you've never done it before, now is the time to start. Not just because it's good business, but because friendship is its own reward. You'll never regret having another friend.